In todays adventure, we bring closure to the first seasons adventure with Sheila, Dingo and Bricko.
Jimbo
was pissed and sitting in the only mode of transport left for the
boys to leave in !
“
What the fuck were you pulling?” he
yelled “ I knew I couldn’t trust you fuckers he yelled”
“Well
Jimbo mate, we didn’t technically call the cops….that, was your
neighbour”
“There is no technicality you dumb fuck” Jimbo yelled "How are you ever
going to pay me back ?
“Well
Jimbo, We figured that we aint done nothing wrong, so we wont be
paying you back”
“What
do you mean you wont be paying me back ?” Jimbo asked
“
Well Jimbo, it would appear that you have
a busted leg, there are 2 of us and we can kick your fucking arse”
Dingo said looking at Bricko for support
“Now
Jimbo, were not inclined to take violence out on people not wearing
security jackets but I think you get the point” Bricko continued.
“Well
fuckers, even with a busted leg I could still kick your arse” Jimbo
as he started to climb out of the car…
Whilst
Jimbo and the boys were arguing, Sheila sped toward Jimbos house……in
a car…. with a friend of hers that she had recognized whilst
yelling and screaming in Centrelink.
Now it shouldn’t go without
mention that Sheila didn’t go and get her dole check, she just
walked in and yelled “ I need to leave, and when I get back I
wanted my fucking dole check !!!” thats when she spotted someone
that could help her get to Jimbo's place.
Jimbo
stepped out of his car and turned around as another car sped towards them,
he stared at Dingo and Bricko in horror as the car continued to drive
faster and faster !
“
What the fuck have you done, you silly
cunts !!” Jimbo said as he quickly jumped back in his car and
started the car
“
I will fucking get you back and it aint
going to be pretty” He yelled as he sped off down the road in the
opposite direction of the car moving faster and faster towards them.
All
of a sudden the car came to a halt and Dingo and Bricko stared at
each other and then at Sheila in the passenger seat. Sheila jumped
and looked at the bruise on Dingo face.
“ What the fuck have they
done to ya ?” Sheila asked Dingo.
“ Well me and Bricko had us a
plan and stuff, but fucking that security guard from the club turned
up”,” How the fuck did that happen?” Sheila asked. “ It’s
a long story, we should be discussing down at the pub” Bricko said
as he reached into pocket and pulled out the window washing earnings
”
do you think your mate can give us a lift ?” he asked.
“Well
I should probably explain who’s in the car” Sheila said as the
boys climbed into the back seat. As Dingo and Bricko got into the
car, there was a baby seat in the center of the back seat and in the
front of the car was a familiar face. Jimbo's Ex…..
Now, It
was a common story in Boganwood that Jimbo was a bit of a ladies man
who had been dodging child support for months, moving from house to
house to keep ahead of his ex, Karen (or Kazza).
She had got pregnant
to Jimbo and when she hit him up for support, he kept running and
saying he didn’t have a job. This was the first time in months that
Kazza had tracked him down and the reason why he pissed off so quickly.
To say she owed them was an understatement, although he had got away
yet again the fucker !
Kazza
turned to the boys “ Alright boys, lets head to the pub! Me mums got
the bub so we can put one on and talk about where you think Jimbo
might pop his head up again. Sound like a plan ?”
“Fuck
yeah” Dingo and Bricko yelled at the same time
“
No fucking way !” Sheila yelled!! “ I
want my fucking dole check !!!!! Get me to fucking Centrelink”….
The
crew pulled up to centrelink and Sheila bolted out of the car and barged
her way to the front counter ! She was a women on a mission and no
one was going to stop her. The reception saw her coming and paged the
security guard, but no one came.
The
manager sulked his way to the counter and whispered to the
receptionist.
“What do you mean the security guard called in sick,
Diesel is never sick” She turned to Sheila who was pissed !
“Wheres
my fucking dole check !”
“Its
not dole day, mam”
“I
aint no fucking mam and it is fucking dole day”
The
supervisor turned to her manager for support
“ Im sorry you are
disappointed, but we cant issue checks here I'm sorry. Can we get your
details and we will get back to you ?”
“No
you fucking cant, you bald headed fuck”
“Now, I'm sorry but you cant use language like that”
“What
are you, racist of something ?” Sheila yelled
“I'm
sorry I'm confused, what does race have to do with me talking about
your language ?”
“Yeah
I think you are confused, go and get my dole check or I'm gonna ring
Julia Gillard and stuff, and go to Current affair over you refusing
to pay a pregnant women, and you were racist towards me and you swore
at me….. "Sheila continued her rant.
The
manager didn’t know what to do, this was unprecedented and there
was no one to help him. It was at that moment that Bricko walked in
wearing his security jacket, and the manager felt a sense of relief
wash over him.
“Thank
you sir, this bogan needs to be removed off the premises please”
Bricko
didn’t understand at first, but then he rembered that with the
jacket they thought he was the guard. He reached over and whispered
something to the manager, all of a sudden the managers face went
white.
Sheila
continued her tirade on everything and anything she could think off “
And then I was thrown out on the streets, and physically assaulted
and you wouldn’t help me and made me homeless”
The
manager turned to Sheila “ Im so sorry for any inconvenience we
have caused you, I will go and get your check straight way". Sheila
stopped ranting and turned toward Bricko as the manager started to
walk off “What did you say to him” She asked.
“Don’t
you worry about what I said” Bricko smiled at Sheila.
Dingo
and Kazza sat in the car and waited as Sheila and Bricko walked out
of the office and got into the car. “Lets got to the Pub” Sheila
said “ I GOT MY FUCKING DOLE CHECK “
So that brings the first season to a close.
If you want more Boganwood, drop us a line at boganwood@hotmailc.om or come back and visit boganwood.com for the latest content.
Boganwood is also available on iTunes and Stitcher smart radio.
...............................................
Jimbos car sped up the road as a number of thoughts crossed his mind. How the fuck had they found Kazza, shit he had been dodging her for months ! It was time he stopped underestimating these fuckers, ever since he had been involved with Dingo and Bricko it had all started to turn to shit.
He tried to work through his next move
Should he move states ?
Should he keep running ?
She he just stay the fuck away from Bricko and DIngo ?
No fucking way, he thought as he made his way towards Centrelink. As he pulled into the car park, away from the crew sitting in Kazzas car.
Jimbo watched as Sheila got back into the car with Bricko waving around her dole check....
This was far from over he thought, and there was no way he was going to let them get one over on him again.
He quickly made his way to the pub and watched as they all got out of the car, cheering and yahooing ............... Jimbo watched in silence waiting for an opportunity to arise and thats when it happened........
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