Boganwood Season 2 Episode 5

Welcome to Boganwood Australia Canberra’s forgotten suburb

In todays adventure we get straight back into the action as Jimbo goes to get his cash, Shiela meets the pleasant Beryl and Dingo and Bricko race off in search of help.

Diesel walked up the road with his bag full of cash.....

Wow, he thought, finally I get some luck instead of those Bogans fucking everything up.
He kept going over all of the problems from earlier that day and it all kept coming back to Dingo, Bricko and Sheila.
Why had he been so stupid to try and get them again ?
But nothing seemed too far out of his grasp with the bag full of money.
He sat down on a bench and looked in the bag.
It was full of cash.
How did Jimbo come across it ? It was only a matter of hours ago that he was at my place Diesel though as started walking again.

Now poor old Diesel has had a rough trot recently so you could excuse him for what he did next…..

He kept thinking of all the things he could do with the cash, I mean it wasn’t like Jimbo was ever going to be able to call the cops on him he thought.

‘Well it’s the least I deserve’ Diesel said as he continued up the road……


Jimbos luck had changed !
Quickly he thought, all I need to do is go and get the cash and I’m sorted.
The plans as it stood was a simple one
* Go and get the Cash
* Get the fuck out of Boganwood forever

All he had to do was going and grab the money off the useless Diesel and pay him a couple of bucks to keep his mouth shut and everything would fall into place.
He turned his car making his way toward Diesels place when he saw him walking up the road.
As he started moving toward him a taxi pulled over and Diesel got in.
‘Better not be using my money’ Jimbo said to no one in particular as he followed the taxi back to Diesels place.
Well that’s what Jimbo thought anyway.
As the taxi pulled up to the turn off to Diesels place it kept going.
‘What the fuck ?’ Jimbo said
‘He better not be doing anything stupid with my cash’ he said again as he continued to follow the taxi, Diesel and most importantly the cash………

Bricko ran up to a phone box and stopped.
‘No more running Diesel’ bricko said ‘Ive got a mate I need a favour from’ he said as he reached for the phone and called the operator.
“Give us some privacy, would ya’ Bricko said as he closed the door behind him.
‘What the fuck !’ Dingo yelled ‘hurry up we need to go and save Sheila’ he continued as he banged and banged on the phone booth.
It was only a small time when Bricko hung up the phone and opened the door.
‘We need about 10 minutes’ Bricko explained ‘Until then let’s go and check out what we are up against’.
 ‘Who did you call?’ Dingo asked Bricko.
‘Just a mate and they will be here to help real soon’ he said as the made their way back to Sheila….

Sheila stared at the old women.
‘I reakon you is fucked in the head’ she said to Beryl staring at her.
‘Why would you say that sweety ?’ beryl responded.
‘Cut the shit Grandma’ Sheila said to Beryl “ I may be a lot of things, but I aint stupid’ she explained.
‘I want my money Sheila ?’ Beryl asked
‘What Fucking money ?’
‘Don’t fuck with me, Im capable of a lot of things and my patience is wearing thin’ beryl explained.
Sheila racked her head trying to figure it out.
“Ive no idea what your talking about’
‘The money from the club, you fucking Bogan !’ Beryl screamed

All of a sudden the realisation of what Beryl was after hit Sheila like a ton of bricks. Now when I say the realisation hit Sheila let me elaborate a wee bit more.
As Sheila didn’t actually know anything about the robbery, other than a couple of blokes had robbed their local pub only moments before they had entered, Sheila didn’t even make that connection as she had come to realisation that Beryl was the grandma from the pub she had met weeks ago. Sheila had placed a connection with Beryl but it wasn’t exactly the right one ……

‘You have the fucking money’ Sheila said
‘What ?’ beryl asked
‘You took the money’ Sheila explained.
‘What ?’
‘Don’t act stupid with me’ Sheila yelled at Beryl.
Pat and Rabbit looked at Beryl.
Beryl looked at Pat and Rabbit.
‘what she talking about Beryl’ Pat asked moving toward Beryl.
‘I have no fucking idea what she is talking about’ Beryl said as she moved backward away from the approaching men.
‘yeah you fucking do’ Sheila explained ‘Her and the manager took it’ Sheila explained not realising what she was saying.
‘And I is pregnant and  stuff…….’ Sheila started on her rant.
‘Just stop’ Beryl said to Pat.
‘None of this makes sense’ Berly said as Sheila kept ranting in the Background
“And then the fucking Diesel the security guard turned up and she made him take us out ……’ Sheila continued her rant.

As Beryl kept speaking
‘Stop now !’ She yelled. Pat and Rabbit stopped.
‘None of this makes sense’ She continued
‘Let’s leave her here and go and talk about it in the other room’ she compromised as both rabbit and Pat followed her out of the room.

Sheila looked around the room, continuing her rant trying to find a way out.
The back door was now deadlocked and that was no longer an option.
She went through the drawer looking for a weapon to use but there was nothing more than a butter knife…… she continued her rant.

She looked around searching and hoping for a way out and that’s when she saw it…..

Beryl calmed the boys down explaining that she had no idea what Sheila was talking about and how stupid the idea was that she would rip them off when she heard……

Jimbo sat in the car watching as Diesel moved along the road in the taxi making his way toward an undisclosed location……….

Dingo and Bricko searched everywhere around the house for a way in and couldn’t find one. The only option was the front door and that’s where Bricko’s plan would come into action. The quietly made their way back to the road and waited as a car pulled. Out of a the car a female started walking toward them waving at Bricko, Bricko Smiled and turned to Dingo.

‘Fuck me Bricko, who is that ?’ he asked as she meet them out the front of Beryl’s house…….

So thats where we leave Boganwood for today, with a range of things about to come to a head.

Come back to find the answers to the questions

* What did Sheila find in the kitchen ?
* Who is the lady helping Dingo and Bricko ?
* Where the fuck is Diesel off too with the cash ?

Come back to Boganwood to find the answers to these and more questions as Season 2 of Boganwood continues and remember what they say in Bogawood…..

‘With the baby bonus, I can buy me a big screen TV’

Boganwood Season 2 Episode 2

Welcome to Boganwood Australia, Canberras forgotten suburb.
In todays adventure we check back in on Sheila, Dingo, Kazza and Bricko as they make their way home after a big day and have themselves a bit of a shin dig.

“…….and then I said you owe me fucking money’ Sheila said to the car full of people. Bricko looked over at her ‘It just happened Sheila, we were there with you’. ‘Yeah I fucking know I was just saying Bricko ! God I’m pregnant you know, you should treat me better’ Bricko laughed at that and rolled his eyes at Dingo.

Dingo sat in the back of the car watching the interaction and hoping that Bricko didn’t stir up Sheila. He had to live with her and she could be hell if she didn’t get her way. He eagerly awaited the first drink as the made their way to the supermarket to grab some grog. As they came up to the store Bricko and Dingo turned to each other ….’Um we will stay in the car for this one Sheil’s’ Dingo said. ‘Fuck you’re a useless cunt, Dingo. I’m pregnant ! Hows am I meant to carry my goon bag and cigarettes in the condition I’m in ?’ Sheila asked. Bricko responded ‘Hey Kazza, can you give Sheils a hand…. Dingo and I should probably not go into the supermarket for a couple of weeks’ he continued as he looked over to Dingo with a smile on his face. ‘ Fucking useless’ Sheila yelled as she slammed the door. Kazza turned to the boy ‘Hey guys, I cant kick on tonight sorry. I have to go grab me kid from mum so I will have to drop you guys off and catch up with you later’ She said… Sheila called out ‘ Carn Kazza, I want some ciggies’.

‘All good’ Said Bricko. ‘We appreciate your help today and if you could drop us off at home after grabbing the drinks, we would be forever in your debt’ he smiled. ‘Thanks Bricko’ Kazza flirted as she raced off to stop Sheila from yelling in the back ground.

‘What the fuck was that ?’ Dingo asked. ‘That my friend is called flirting with a beautiful women, my friend’ Bricko said and Dingo started in on him. ‘It’s fucking something alright you fucking dick….oh I love you sweetheart….oh please come over my place so we can smoke bongs….’ Dingo started. ‘Leave it alone Dingo’ Bricko smiled but Dingo continued ‘ You don’t know romance until you meet a girl as classy as Sheila, Bricko’ Dingo said and Bricko couldn’t help himself ‘ Yeah I know what you mean mate, its not true love until you pregnant defacto threatens to glass someone for you’ he laughed and Dingo responded ‘Fucking oath mate, fucking oath’. They both laughed.
It was only a couple of minute before they heard the familiar rantings of Sheila as she left the supermarket yelling at the top of her lungs ‘I didn’t steal nothing you fuck, I’m pregnant you fucking perve…… I paid for these drinks’ she continued as she jumped into the front seat. Kazza jumped in beside her looking flustered as Sheila reached into her tracky daks and pulled out two goon bags…..
‘Fucking accuse me of stealing’ she said and Kazza placed the bought items next to the stolen items and they continued on to Sheilas place……

The leader ‘Pat’ pulled up the front of the house and sad idle in the drive way.
‘Beryls pissed mate’ he said to Rabbit.
‘She nots someone I want on my bad side…..Ive heard some truly frightening stories’ Rabbit responded as they turned on the radio and waited for Kazza to turn up with Sheila, Bricko and Dingo. Rabbit reached over and turned on the radio
‘Police are looking for three men that robbed a local club in Canberra today. After about 5pm this afternoon, three masked men walked into a club armed and demanding money from the reception and bar staff. In their attempt to leave the premises one of the men stumbled and fell into an ATM, injury his leg. The police are on the looking for 3 middle aged males, one with an injured leg and they ask that you do not approach them as they are armed and suspected to be dangerous. They were last seen heading south, in a Holden Commodore…..’. Rabbit and Pat looked at each other ‘Fuck’ they said at the same time. ‘We need to ditch the car’ Pat said.

They quickly started the car and pulled out of the street at the same time that Kazza approached from the opposite side.
‘So since Kazza is piking’ Sheila started ‘ What the plans ?’
‘Well, they are the same as originally planned’ Bricko responded.
‘Yeah but who are you gonna root ?’ She responded.
Bricko was startled by the question.
‘I might be pregnant Bricko, but I aint fucking stupid’ Sheila smiled.
‘ I don’t know what your talking about’ Bricko stumbled. 
“you fucking do, you dirty fuck’ Sheila continued.
“ I saw the way you was looking at her and let me tell you she is keen for it as well’ Sheila looked over at Kazza who was now bright red in the face ‘Fuck me Sheila’
‘Not on your fucking life’ Sheila smiled at Bricko. “I is pregnant with my mans baby’ She said as she smiled at Dingo. Kazza sat in silence as she stopped out the front of the house.

Sheila, Dingo and Bricko jumped out of the car passing on their thanks.
Bricko remained behind as Dingo pulled Sheila toward the house
‘ Don’t root her out the front, Bricko ! Women need some love and care, you should take her to dinner at Red Rooter or something’ She continued as Dingo put his hand over her mouth…..

Bricko stared as Sheila she was dragged into the house and stayed to talk to her.
Dingo opened the front door and pulled Sheila into it.
‘Fuckin Hell Sheila, that was real tactfull of ya. Leave the poor cunt alone’ he said as Sheila stared out the front window. ‘ Stick it in her you romantic fuck !’ She yelled banging on the window and at that Kazza pulled away leaving Bricko walking toward the house.

Bricko walked in the door and stared at Sheila, he thought to himself that even trying to explain to Sheila how inappropriate that was would only fall on deaf ears so he quickly said.
‘Hey Sheils, go get the bong…. I need some pot’
Sheila didn’t think twice as she raced out of the room.
Dingo and Bricko made their way out to the clothes line pegging a goon bag on each of the four corners.

Each corner had a chair placed under it and they sat down waiting for Sheila to return.
Now this was a common game for people of Australia and Boganwood. The rules were simple you spun the clothes line until it stopped and whichever corner you sat on you got whatever shot was inside. The trick was that one of the corners had lolly water under it ‘Sambucca’ which was a liquorice flavoured goon bag and it wasn’t something you wanted to mix with the other wine and ock sucking cowboy bags…..
If you were the first the spew then you would never live it down. See in Boganwood a unique Fad had been created where a picture of you naked was posted on every community board in the city as punishment for losing the game and no one wanted to lose it. The boys sat in the chair preparing themselves for a big night as Sheila raced out the back door.
‘Fucking hell, we have run out of pot’ she said with a stoned look in her eyes.’ We need some more before we fucking start’ she continued and Bricko and Dingo looked at each other. ‘ I’m guessing Bricko and I should be going then to get some then ?’ Dingo asked Sheila. ‘Well I’m fucking pregnant, and cat go, plus Im sure it was you that smoked the last of it’ She yelled. ‘I’m sure it was’ Bricko smiled at Dingo as they got up and made their way to their local dealer….

When would this day fucking end … they thought as they walked up the street.
Sheila pulled out the last of the dope and lit her bong taking the moments peace as someone walked into the back yard. She stared at the people thinking it was Bricko and Dingo back and they had forgotten something. She quickly put the bong down as the figures moved closer and she realised it wasn’t Bricko or Dingo…….

She exhaled the hit

‘What the fuck ? Did the postman finally decide to bring my fucking Centrelink cheque’ she said as the figure moved closer and that when she realised she was in trouble…… again…….

So that where we leave Sheila and the boys as the never ending day continues to get from bad to worse….. but things have a way of working themselves out in Boganwood. Both the good, the bad and definitely the bogan…..

Come back to Boganwood to find the answers to the question
* What will happen to Sheila ?
* Is love blossoming for the budding romantic Bricko ?
* And why the fuck is the postman at Sheilas house ?
All this will be answered and more in the continuation of Boganwood Season 2

Boganwood Episode 8 (Season 1 Finale)

Welcome to Boganwood, Canberra, (Au)stralia the forgotten suburb.

 In todays adventure, we bring closure to the first seasons adventure with Sheila, Dingo and Bricko.

Jimbo was pissed and sitting in the only mode of transport left for the boys to leave in !

“ What the fuck were you pulling?” he yelled “ I knew I couldn’t trust you fuckers he yelled”

“Well Jimbo mate, we didn’t technically call the cops….that, was your neighbour”

“There is no technicality you dumb fuck” Jimbo yelled "How are you ever going to pay me back ?

“Well Jimbo, We figured that we aint done nothing wrong, so we wont be paying you back”

“What do you mean you wont be paying me back ?” Jimbo asked

“ Well Jimbo, it would appear that you have a busted leg, there are 2 of us and we can kick your fucking arse” Dingo said looking at Bricko for support

“Now Jimbo, were not inclined to take violence out on people not wearing security jackets but I think you get the point” Bricko continued.

“Well fuckers, even with a busted leg I could still kick your arse” Jimbo as he started to climb out of the car…

Whilst Jimbo and the boys were arguing, Sheila sped toward Jimbos house……in a car…. with a friend of hers that she had recognized whilst yelling and screaming in Centrelink.

Now it shouldn’t go without mention that Sheila didn’t go and get her dole check, she just walked in and yelled “ I need to leave, and when I get back I wanted my fucking dole check !!!” thats when she spotted someone that could help her get to Jimbo's place.

Jimbo stepped out of his car and turned around as another car sped towards them, he stared at Dingo and Bricko in horror as the car continued to drive faster and faster !

“ What the fuck have you done, you silly cunts !!” Jimbo said as he quickly jumped back in his car and started the car

“ I will fucking get you back and it aint going to be pretty” He yelled as he sped off down the road in the opposite direction of the car moving faster and faster towards them.

All of a sudden the car came to a halt and Dingo and Bricko stared at each other and then at Sheila in the passenger seat. Sheila jumped and looked at the bruise on Dingo face. 

“ What the fuck have they done to ya ?” Sheila asked Dingo. 

“ Well me and Bricko had us a plan and stuff, but fucking that security guard from the club turned up”,” How the fuck did that happen?” Sheila asked. “ It’s a long story, we should be discussing down at the pub” Bricko said as he reached into pocket and pulled out the window washing earnings

” do you think your mate can give us a lift ?” he asked.

“Well I should probably explain who’s in the car” Sheila said as the boys climbed into the back seat. As Dingo and Bricko got into the car, there was a baby seat in the center of the back seat and in the front of the car was a familiar face. Jimbo's Ex…..

Now, It was a common story in Boganwood that Jimbo was a bit of a ladies man who had been dodging child support for months, moving from house to house to keep ahead of his ex, Karen (or Kazza). 

She had got pregnant to Jimbo and when she hit him up for support, he kept running and saying he didn’t have a job. This was the first time in months that Kazza had tracked him down and the reason why he pissed off so quickly. To say she owed them was an understatement, although he had got away yet again the fucker !

Kazza turned to the boys “ Alright boys, lets head to the pub! Me mums got the bub so we can put one on and talk about where you think Jimbo might pop his head up again. Sound like a plan ?”

“Fuck yeah” Dingo and Bricko yelled at the same time

“ No fucking way !” Sheila yelled!! “ I want my fucking dole check !!!!! Get me to fucking Centrelink”….

The crew pulled up to centrelink and Sheila bolted out of the car and barged her way to the front counter ! She was a women on a mission and no one was going to stop her. The reception saw her coming and paged the security guard, but no one came.

The manager sulked his way to the counter and whispered to the receptionist. 

“What do you mean the security guard called in sick, Diesel is never sick” She turned to Sheila who was pissed !

“Wheres my fucking dole check !”

“Its not dole day, mam”

“I aint no fucking mam and it is fucking dole day”

The supervisor turned to her manager for support 

“ Im sorry you are disappointed, but we cant issue checks here I'm sorry. Can we get your details and we will get back to you ?”

“No you fucking cant, you bald headed fuck”

“Now, I'm sorry but you cant use language like that”

“What are you, racist of something ?” Sheila yelled

“I'm sorry I'm confused, what does race have to do with me talking about your language ?”

“Yeah I think you are confused, go and get my dole check or I'm gonna ring Julia Gillard and stuff, and go to Current affair over you refusing to pay a pregnant women, and you were racist towards me and you swore at me….. "Sheila continued her rant.

The manager didn’t know what to do, this was unprecedented and there was no one to help him. It was at that moment that Bricko walked in wearing his security jacket, and the manager felt a sense of relief wash over him.

“Thank you sir, this bogan needs to be removed off the premises please”

Bricko didn’t understand at first, but then he rembered that with the jacket they thought he was the guard. He reached over and whispered something to the manager, all of a sudden the managers face went white.

Sheila continued her tirade on everything and anything she could think off “ And then I was thrown out on the streets, and physically assaulted and you wouldn’t help me and made me homeless”

The manager turned to Sheila “ Im so sorry for any inconvenience we have caused you, I will go and get your check straight way". Sheila stopped ranting and turned toward Bricko as the manager started to walk off “What did you say to him” She asked.

“Don’t you worry about what I said” Bricko smiled at Sheila.

Dingo and Kazza sat in the car and waited as Sheila and Bricko walked out of the office and got into the car. “Lets got to the Pub” Sheila said “ I GOT MY FUCKING DOLE CHECK “

So that brings the first season to a close.

If you want more Boganwood, drop us a  line at boganwood@hotmailc.om or come back and visit boganwood.com for the latest content.

Boganwood is also available on iTunes and Stitcher smart radio.

...............................................

Jimbos car sped up the road as a number of thoughts crossed his mind. How the fuck had they found Kazza, shit he had been dodging her for months ! It was time he stopped underestimating these fuckers, ever since he had been involved with Dingo and Bricko it had all started to turn to shit.

He tried to work through his next move

Should he move states ?

Should he keep running ?

She he just stay the fuck away from Bricko and DIngo ?

No fucking way, he thought as he made his way towards Centrelink. As he pulled into the car park, away from the crew sitting in Kazzas car. 

Jimbo watched as Sheila got back into the car with Bricko  waving around her dole check....

This was far from over he thought, and there was no way he was going to let them get one over on him again.

He quickly made his way to the pub and watched as they all got out of the car, cheering and yahooing ............... Jimbo watched in silence waiting for an opportunity to arise and thats when it happened........

Boganwood Episode 7

Welcome to Boganwood, (Au)stralia Canberra's forgotten suburb.

In today adventure, we jump straight back into the action and check back in on Dingo and Bricko as they tackle the problem that is Diesel and Jimbo……

We also found out what happened to Sheila

Sheila stared at what was in front of her, confused over the events that had just unfolded.

What the fuck was going on ?

What the fuck had Jimbo just done ? It all happened so fast she didn’t have the time to put the pieces together and now here she stood, trying to think of what her next move should be…….

.....Brinko and Dingo didn’t know what to do, they had to think quick.

Yeah Dingo had come up with a plan but that would take some time and that was something they surely didn’t have. Diesel grabbed Dingo from behind, spinning him around and hit him in the gut.

Bang !

“ What the fuck ! you fuckwit! don’t hit me mate !”

Diesel laughed as he went to hit him again, but this time Bricko launched…

“Stop this Shit !” Jimbo yelled at them. “ We need to start working out how we can get what is owed to us…

“These are the fuckers that rolled me” Diesel explained. 

“What the fuck drugs are you on you silly cunt ?” Bricko said to Diesel. 

“At the fucking club, you and your mate rolled me you bogan fuck !”

It was at this time that the realisation kicked in for both Dingo and Bricko as the realised who Diesel was for the first time. 

“ Your that cunt from the club that tried to man handle us that time”. 

“ You got a lucky punch on me, that’s all” Diesel said as he laid another boot into Dingo on the ground.

“Stop this shit” Jimbo yelled ! “ We can get to the revenge part, as soon as we discuss a few things”

“ What the fuck Jimbo, whats all this shit about ! And more to the point what have you done to fucking Sheila you dero fuck ?”

“I aint done nothing to Sheila” Jimbo said “ I dropped her off at … “

,.......“Fucking Centrelink” Sheila yelled at the top of her lungs ! 

The fucker Jimbo had dropped her off at Centrelink, what the fuck was going on she thought to herself ? 

How the fuck did this happen and what should she do next ? This is exactly where she wanted to be, but the feeling that something bad was about to happen kept creeping into Sheila. 

The choice as it stood to her was not a simple one

Either get the dole check ! Or go and save Dingo and Bricko from Jimbo ? What the fuck ?? This wasn’t even a choice in Sheila’s books, but she had to think of a plan ! Sheila walked into Centrelink passing a large amount of people standing in line……

.......“ You dropped her off at centrelink ? What the fuck plan is that you silly cunt ?”

Jimbo laughed “ I had no intention of hurting Sheila, she hasn’t hurt anyone…..much.

 But you guys owe me some money for that whole supermarket incident and it appears that you may also owe old Diesel a few things.”

Diesel kicked Dingo again and laughed

“Stop kicking me you cunt” Dingo mumbled as the pain hit him in the ribs.

“ You touch him again and I'm going to make you hurt princess” Bricko said to Diesel as he stared at him. Diesel smiled and kicked him again and Bricko was about to launch when Jimbo yelled 

“ ENOUGH !, What the fuck ??? are you children ? Cant you fuckers get control of yourselves ? We are here to discuss business and after I get what I want, Diesel you can get what you want”

“ Fair enough mate” Diesel said to Jimbo “ What did you want ?”

“Well for starters, I think I'm entitled to a bit of the pension so to speak with my busted leg and stuff and since you boys look like you had a good day, maybe I should take a small percentage” Jimbo said as he made his way up to the house. 

“ What did you make today ? Where’s the money” He said to Bricko.

It was at that moment that Dingo started to laugh.

“What the fuck are you laughing at ?” Jimbo said.

“Well Jimbo , it appears that we don’t have the money on us sorry”

“What do you mean, you don’t have it on you ?”

“Well, as we thought you had Sheila, we needed some of that collateral so we hid it around the back of your neighbors house on a couple of bikes we grabbed on the way here..”

“Well that is convenient” Jimbo said

“Yep” Dingo continued “ And we figured we could trade the money for Sheila, but as you don’t have her anymore… can we just trade the money for you guys to stop hurting us ?”

“Well that will depend on how much money is there ?”

“As it is Jimbo, the money is actually on a bucket attached to the bikes" Dingo continued “

 And if you were to take the bikes and the money you would have a nice little nest egg”

“ Now Dingo you wouldn’t be setting me up would you ?”

“Nah mate, we just want an end to this crap”

“Yeah, there’s something not right about it” JImbo said

“ Trust me mate, it aint my fault you busted your leg. That was an accident and I don’t want you to be disadvantaged any longer”

“ Well how does this sound ?, But I will take Bricko with me and you stay here with Diesel ??”

“Ok if you think that is a plan, then let’s do it” 

Bricko said as he made his way passed Jimbo and around the corner.

Jimbo followed as Diesel stared down at Dingo 

“ Now me and you can have some fun, Diesel said as he punched into Dingo”

Jimbo rounded the corner and he could smell something that wasn’t right. 

As he turned the corner away from Diesel view he could see the bikes standing upright in front of him, with the bucket attached to the handle.

He slowly made his way to the bikes calling out “ Hey Bricko, where the fuck are you ?”

The bikes were laying up against the neighbors house and as he moved forward he notice that there was glass on the ground, where a window had been smashed.

This was very weird and Bricko was still no where to be seen. None of it made sense and Jimbo decided to start walking back to his house when he heard the cop car coming down the street, sirens blazing….

Diesel laughed as he punched Dingo again. As he pulled his hand back for the punch, Bricko appeared out of no where and punched Diesel in the face! Diesel was stunned and didn’t have time to think as Dingo jumped up and stood above him

“ Now princess, you cant be hitting me like that “ Dingo said

“Now didn’t I warn you not to touch him again” Bricko asked ?

“ Pretty sure I did, but that’s something we can work out inside, as it going to get busy around here real fast”

Brinko, Dingo and Diesel entered the house to have another discussion with good old Diesel. Now I don’t think I need to go into too much detail, but lets just say he got what he deserved.

Dingo and Bricko walked out of the house, with Bricko sporting his nice new security jacket.

 

“I will get you fuckers !!!” Diesel yelled as they closed the door behind him.

They looked around for a mode of transport and there was Jimbos car in the driveway. As they started to make their way toward it, a police officer pulled up along side them “ Hello officer” Bricko said in his nice new jacket.

“We chased those guys that stole them bikes to the house next door” Bricko said

“ Thanks boys, let me know if you see anything suss” The officer said as he shot off down the road.

Bricko and Dingo laughed at the success of Dingo’s bright idea and continued to make their way to Jimbo’s car.

“We need to go get Sheila Bricko, she will be worried about us”

“Fuck yeah mate, we need to hurry up as well”

As they reached for the door to Jimbo’s car to get in, there was Jimbo sitting in the front seat and you thought he looked pissed before ? Well that wasn’t nothing to how he looked now

“Rule number one in Boganwood boys ! Don’t call the fucking cops” He yelled………………..

So that’s where we leave the boys for today with the pissed off Jimbo…. 

But that’s another story to be continued another day…….

Now it shouldn’t go without mention that Jimbo was right, that you should never call the cops in boganwood, but what he didn’t know was they didn’t..... the neighbours did it after someone threw a brick through their fucking window…  but that’s another story that will be continued another day......

Boganwood is a place of many adventures and things have way to work them selves out....

Come back to Boganwood to find the answer to the questions

What will happen to Dingo and Bricko ?

Did Sheila get her centrelink check ?

All will be answered in the next episodes and remember what they say in Boganwood…..

You can’t fuck your neighbor !

Boganwood Episode 6

Welcome to Boganwood, (Au)stralia, Canberra’s the forgotten suburb.

In today’s adventure we jump straight back into the action as Sheila and Jimbo drive towards the undisclosed location, check back in on Dingo and Bricko as they race towards Jimbo house…….

The car continues to make its way down the street as Shelia turned to Jimbo.

“Alright Jimbo, I get the point…..we did you wrong and we need to put things right”

Jimbo smiled and reached down and put an old Jimmy Barnes tape into the tape deck he had installed himself. Sheila kept watching him trying to discuss the issue at hand

“Jimbo, I get your pissed. But how is it my fault ? I didn’t even do nufing….” Jimbo continued to drive…..

…….Meanwhile Bricko and Dingo continued up the road running after the car, looking for a mode of transport to get to Jimbo’s place quicker. As they continue their way up the road, they saw two cyclists riding past in the bike lane and that’s when a plan kicked into Brickos mind.

“Hey Dingo, I got me a plan follow me…..” Bricko yelled as he continued to run. As they made their way toward the next set of traffic lights, Bricko stopped and grabbed Dingo….

“What the fuck Bricko, we have to get Sheila….” Dingo yelled “ She the love of my life, we have been together since we was 12” he continued.

Bricko caught his breathe and jumped in “Stop Dingo mate, I need you to trust me”  he stood and waiting for the traffic light to turn red.

Dingo stopped ranting for a moment and watched Bricko as he started to wash windows. “ Theres no fucking time” Dingo yelled ! “ But Bricko continued washing the windows as two cyclists made their way to the traffic lights. Now anyone that knows cyclists that ride on the road knows that the road rules only apply to them when it’s convenient and a red light was not something they were going to stop for.

Bricko placed himself next to a car that sat along the bicycle path and as the cyclist were about to drive past, he opened the driver’s side door !

BANG !

Both cyclists ran into the door and fell of their bikes

The driver was in shock !

The riders were in shock !

Bricko was far from being in shock, he yelled at Dingo “ Come one mate, we are in a hurry!”

Dingo stood startled at what had just happened, but quickly made his way towards the now vacant bikes. Bricko grabbed the first one, and started to get onto it as drivers started to get out of their cars to look after the hurt cyclists. Dingo grabbed the second bike, but felt he should say something to the now injured cyclists

“A red light means stop fuck wit!, ride on the roads ! Obey the fucking rules”

He grabbed a handful of change and threw it at them “We just bought your bikes…half prices cause they are dented”

Bricko laughed as he started to ride off thinking of the backward logic he had used to acquire the perfectly rideable dented bikes and Dingo followed. As they continued down to Jimbo’s place riding their bikes a small crowd had gathered around the driver (who was still in shock) and the 2 cyclists who were perfectly alright except for their ego…… oh yeah and the fact they didn’t have bikes….

Bricko and Dingo kept riding as they made their way through the pathways and crossroad to get through to Jimbos place making great pace…….

As Jimbo kept driving as Sheila kept yelling at him “You said you wanted to talk ! Now talk !!”. Jimbo kept singing and reached across to turn the stereo off.

He turned to Sheila “ Now Sheila, Don’t be like that. I haven’t done anything to hurt you unlike the other 2 idiots you hang out with”

 Sheila continued to rant trying to work out what she would do to escape this position. “ Jesus Jimbo, what the fuck ! How is this shit my fault ? You know I’m pregnant and stuff don’t you ?? “

“Well Sheila, I’m thinking that may be debateable but, you would know best as you usually do “

“ Yeah but what about letting me go ? Why can’t you just pull over and let me out ??”

“ Well that’s because I have a wee bit of a plan I need your help with”

“What fucking plan you dero fuck !”

“ You will see Sheila” Jimbo quickly spun the wheel on the car crossing over the lanes and driving every faster “ This part of the story is over for the likes of you Sheila !” Jimbo laughed with a weird look in his eyes as he continued to drive faster and faster.

As this was occurring Jimbo and Bricko were making great time and were only moments away from Jimbos place. So they decided they should discuss their tactic before reaching his house and stopped riding.

“ Alright what’s the plan of attack” Dingo asked Bricko

“ Well he has a busted leg, and he isn’t known for using weapons so I think he may just want a cut of our window washing business”

“ Yep, Bricko, I know you’re the thinking man… but maybe your shouldn’t call it our Window washing business in front of him?”

“ Shit your right, that could be our negotiating point. It’s weird really, we gave him the thing he wanted, and opportunity to sue the supermarket and he is after us ?”

“ Yep I agree it don’t make no sense Bricko. But we need a plan”

“ Ok well I need to think clearly” Bricko said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a joint.

“ I like you’re thinking” Dingo said as he waited for Bricko to light the joint. Bricko took a puff and handed it to Dingo and as Dingo put the joint to his mouth and that when came up with a plan of attack…

……Jimbo slammed on the breaks as Sheila stared out the window in shock !

“ Your fucking kidding me” she yelled at Jimbo

“Nope Sheila, sorry this is the end for you”

Jimbo said as he reached across the car

……

Bricko and Dingo pulled their newly acquired bikes up to Jimbos place, but his car was nowhere to be seen. They looked around the yard…. Where was he ?

They walked around the house and couldn’t see a door or window open…

Bricko looked through the window and saw movement

“The fuckers in there! quick!” Bricko yelled as he ran toward the front door of the house. He started banging and yelling through the door.

“Let me in !, Let her out” Both Dingo and Brick yelled getting ready to charge down the door. As they continued to yell and scream they didn’t realise that Jimbo had pulled up in his car and started to get out.

Bricko and Dingo continued to yell, as Jimbo started to walk up behind them……

Jimbo yelled

“ Hello boys”

Dingo and Bricko turned around to see Jimbo holding Sheila cigarette lighter in his hand lighting a ciggie. It was only a matter of moment before the boys realised, Sheila was no longer in the Car !

As these thoughts were digesting, the front door to the house opened and another person step out… Jimbo smiled

“ Boys it about time we have a chat”

“Where the fuck is Sheila! You Cunt” Dingo yelled

“She has been taken ‘good’ care of” Jimbo smiled in a strange way

“Have you met me mate ?”

“ Hello boys, remember me ? “ Diesel said………….

So that’s where we leave Bricko and Dingo for today after they finally make it to Jimbos place only to meet yet another obstacle…. But that’s the story we will continuing another day……. Boganwood is a place of many adventures and things have a tendency to work itself out and in recent events they have taken a serious turn towards the bad element…. Come back to Boganwood to find the answer to the questions

What happened to Sheila ?

How is Jimbo going to seek his revenge for the incidents that unfolded ?

Why is Diesel at Jimbos place ? and

Where are to cops while all this is going on ??

All will be answered in the next episodes and remember what they say to their kids in Bogan wood…..

 Don’t you fucken swear you little shit !