Boganwood Episode 4

Welcome to Boganwood, Canberra, (Au)stralia the forgotten suburb

Sheila sat in the car cursing at Jimbo and reaching across the wheel to hit and punch him, but Jimbo kept driving his car to the undisclosed location with a smile on his face and a strange look in his eyes. 

It was only moment ago that Sheila remembered that the events the day before hadn’t gone as planned. Yes they had given Dingo and Bricko the window washing business but the actual occurrence hadn’t happened as it was meant to…….. and Jimbo didn’t look too happy about it……….

Now before we continue with Sheila and her misadventures with the ever pleasant and handsome Jimbo, we should take a step back and talk about the reason Sheila is concerned that she is now locked in the car with Jimbo…….

Bricko, Dingo and Jimbo continued to discuss their plan as they walked toward the entrance to the supermarket……..missing out on one key problem…….

Bricko stopped Jimbo and Dingo.

“Guys, we shouldn’t go in together, they will be able to put two and two together, you know with them security cameras and stuff”

“Shit Bricko, thank god for you thinking and stuff, I wouldn’t have thought of that, you got a smart brain Bricko and we should listen to its thoughts” Dingo stated as him and Jimbo stood back.

Bricko entered the store looking around, or scoping the joint, or some other smart word for sussing it out and walked around the store and gave a nod for Dingo to enter.

Dingo and Jimbo entered the store together making their way through the aisles so they could get close to Bricko to nut out the rest of the plan.

Bricko walked down the oil aisle and grabbed a bottle and started his way over to Dingo and Jimbo to discuss their plan.

Now Im not gonna lie here people, have you ever seen three bogans standing next to each other trying to talk about something, when they are pretending they don’t know each other ? Well let me tell you it doesn’t look as inconspicuous as they would have liked to think, that and the fact that Bricko and Dingo had forgotten the one thing that was going to change the events of todays antics.

Although Bricko had walked past the security guard, he didn’t think anything of it. Why would he? today was all about making a so called accident occuring, but as Bricko enetered the store the Security Guard Diesel got a twinge of recognition.

“Fuck where do I know that bloke from” Diesel mumbled to himself. He sat there trying to work it out, but it was only moments later that Dingo walked in and Diesel remembered everything. Those fuckers ! What the fuck are those cunts up to he thought…..

Diesel decided to keep a safe distance to ensure the guys didn’t recognise him as he watched Jimbo join them. There they were, three bogans standing together in an aisle with two bottles of oil….what the fuck was going on he thought to himself. Those are the fuckers that rolled me, he remembered as he peered at Dingo and Bricko ……

Diesel had only been in the local pub for a couple of days now and he was just getting used to the different clientele, when he was called over the loud speaker to come quickly to the pokie machines.

It was there he met both Dingo and Bricko for the first time, sitting at a pokie machine as the feature went off, arguing with a lady.

The manager also walked up and gave Diesel an update on the incident from his perspective. It appears that as the women had gone to the toilet and she left a couple of dollars in her machine and hit the reserve button so no one could play her machine.

The womens version of the story continued…….. she returned from her toilet break and was greeted by Dingo and Bricko now sitting in her seat, playing her machine as the feature continued to rack up the dollars. Dingo and Bricko refused the leave stating that they had taken over the machine after she had left and gone to the toilet. The women went and got the manager to tell him of her misfortune at the hands of a couple of bogans and and the manager decided the best coarse of events was to call the new security guard as Dingo and Bricko had been know for causing problems during previous incidents within the club.

Now as with everything in Boganwood there is always 2 sides to the story, but we don’t have time for the truth here so we will continue with the womens version of events to get to Diesel’s distaste of Dingo and Bricko.

After the club manager asked Diesel to escort Dingo and Bricko off the local club premises, Sheila walked up and started in on them both. She was a trusting women, she was and no one was going to accuse her men of robbing some old lady…..

“Fuck off you dirty old cunt, I bet you just did your pension check and wanted some free cash. My men are not fucking granny stealers” She stated in the heat of the moment “They won that money fair a square, so don’t you fucking touch them”

It was at this point that everyone around them had started to watch as the incidents unfolded. Diesel but his hand on Bricko and Dingo saw red….. he decided to control his anger and stood up string at Diesel.

“Get your fucking hands off my mate, you bullied school kid that couldn’t make it as a police officer !”

Now things were getting out of hand, Diesel was furious ! How did he know all this about his life ?

Yeah he had been bullied in school and failed his police academy application, but who was this bloke to call him on it. He grabbed both Dingo and Bricko at the same time and pulled them toward the exit. Dingo and Bricko followed as Sheila yelled abuse at the top of her lungs as she followed them out “Let go of my husband you fucking dero ! Im going to sue you fuckers for kicking a pregnant women out of a place for no reason and blaming her husband and his mate of stealing !, Im going to current affairs !” Diesel continued dragging them out of the club, out past the front entrance reception desk and into the car park.

Now Bricko and Dingo have been in altercations such as this before because they were seen as easy targets but it didn’t mean they didn’t have a plan for Diesel, that he would soon regret.

Now to keep the pace of the story and to get back into the supermarket we should probabaly skim over this bit and we may revisit it in the future, but long story short…. Diesel ended up with a black eye and Sheila ended up with a security guards jacket…..

So that’s where Diesel remembered them from, the club, the jacket, Dingo and fucking Bricko ! He stood and watched the events as they unfolded.

Bricko took the oil and walked down the dog food aisle, piercing the top and dropping it as he walked. Diesel followed him down the aisle wanting to get revenge from the club knock him down while he wasn’t looking, unaware of the oil he was dropping.

Diesel started to charge at Bricko and  slipped in the oil falling on to his arse and as he was falling Diesel grabbed at the shelf bringing a large amount dog food cans onto his arm. Jimbo walked around the corner as this was unfolding…

“Fuck” Jimbo yelled as he saw the security guard

Bricko turned around at the noises as Jimbo ran off and Dingo came around the corner….. with oil in his hands…… Bricko wasn’t sure why he had oil as they had discussed that he was doing the oil, what the fuck was Dingo with his oil ?

Diesel screamed as his arm broke under the weight of the cans he pulled from the shelf,

Jimbo raced down the soft drink aisle toward the main entrance and slipped in the oil Dingo had dropped,

Dingo turned around and  yelled at Jimbo “I will meet you at the front Door”

“You fuckers got me again” Diesel yelled at Bricko and Dingo

Bricko made his way out of the aisle and walked toward the entrence glancing up the drinks aisle as he left and saw Jimbo laying on the ground with his leg at a crooked angle staring at him and yelling “ Help me you fucking Cunt !, What the fuck have you done you stupid fucks !!”. Dingo grabbed Bricko and yelled “ We have to get out of here……quickly”. They made their way out the front door and started their run home !

“ Jobs done” Dingo said to Bricko

“ Fuck, Im not sure that was the plan Dingo” Bricko stated, trying to work through everything. He needed some dope, that always helped him think clearly, he thought.

“ Listen, he wanted an accident in the shops so he could sue so we gave him one, the way I see it he got what he asked for and with his busted leg he will get more money from them and we can take over his window washing gig while he gets his money….plan successfully done”

Fuck Bricko thought, it kind of made sense but there may be some loose ends that they should probably deal with later…… Who the fuck was the security guard and why did it seem that he knew them ?

Bricko mind raced trying to work through the events and the questions that needed answering.  Dingo smiled at the success of their scheme, thinking of the great new window washing venture they were about to undertake.

Not many thoughts initially came to poor old Jimbo’s well being…. But they would as the next days events unfolded……….

So that’s where we leave Bricko and Dingo for today after their misadventure in the supermarket, little thought was given to the consequences of the events that unfolded…. But that’s another story which we will continue another day……. Boganwood is a place of many adventures and things have a tendency to work itself out and Diesel had now been done over by these guys twice, but we will get to that and with Jimbo taking Sheila things are about to get interesting….

Come back to Boganwood to find the answer to the questions

What will happen to Sheila ?

How is Jimbo going to seek his revenge for the incidents that unfolded ?

Will Diesel finally move on from his revenge against Dingo and Bricko ? and

Where is Diesels Security jacket now ??

All will be answered in the next episodes and remember what they say in Bogan wood…..

Im going to a current affairs !